Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
