So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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