the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize