We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize