i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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