i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
