1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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