I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
