glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
