Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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