I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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