He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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