yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
