I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
