This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
