Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Randomize
