Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
