Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
only you would photoshop your dick
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
