Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize