i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize