so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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