do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
