Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
