just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
