just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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