Texts From Last Night

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  (352): View more from Florida

  I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy

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  (352): I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy http://tfl.nu/uxjr
  Replies (18) Good night (4286) Bad night (766)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.

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  (717): Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall. http://tfl.nu/weml
  Replies (24) Good night (6064) Bad night (710)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.

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  (401): I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy. http://tfl.nu/4ar4
  Replies (38) Good night (6018) Bad night (1330)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth

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  (804): you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth http://tfl.nu/ftsz
  Replies (7) Good night (1162) Bad night (3906)
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  (516): View more from New York

  You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.

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  (516): You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food. http://tfl.nu/5019
  Replies (20) Good night (3603) Bad night (1083)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.

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  (860): I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS. http://tfl.nu/9u6p
  Replies (9) Good night (1585) Bad night (753)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too

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  (407): I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too http://tfl.nu/awue
  Replies (0) Good night (1020) Bad night (569)
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  (315): View more from New York

  i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy

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  (315): i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy http://tfl.nu/pdy7
  Replies (9) Good night (2091) Bad night (881)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?

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  (404): Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders? http://tfl.nu/hbxh
  Replies (2) Good night (452) Bad night (1268)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.

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  (517): It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals. http://tfl.nu/8hcd
  Replies (0) Good night (769) Bad night (392)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.

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  (303): By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share. http://tfl.nu/qyzo
  Replies (0) Good night (610) Bad night (370)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.

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  (570): 2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card. http://tfl.nu/36zr
  Replies (8) Good night (552) Bad night (1347)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.

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  (703): Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused. http://tfl.nu/gh1r
  Replies (2) Good night (526) Bad night (329)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.

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  (317): Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs. http://tfl.nu/v8ra
  Replies (7) Good night (711) Bad night (306)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low

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  (205): At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low http://tfl.nu/ojcg
  Replies (1) Good night (245) Bad night (191)

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