Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.