Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(716): View more from New York

Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad

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(210): View more from Texas

Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?

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(949): View more from California

I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(413): View more from Massachusetts

i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"

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(716): View more from New York

i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly

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(256): View more from Alabama

from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.

(334): View more from Alabama

i do.

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(574): View more from Indiana

I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.

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(937): View more from Ohio

Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY

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