I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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