I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize