dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
