We named our party play list daddy issues
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
