I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
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so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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