Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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