I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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