Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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