Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize