Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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