We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize