I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize