I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Life is so much better after having sex.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
