"it" just moved
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize
