I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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