hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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