All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
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I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
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I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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