we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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