What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
