well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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