I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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