Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
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