Only a mothe r could love this liver
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize