He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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