ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
